if i was less lazy i'd make a category 'whining' and file this under it. now where was i? oh, scattered. got nothing done last night, well, almost nothing, lots of grumping around the house with the old man, who's rather ticked that i chose to subject us to financial ruin without discussing it with him first. or somehting, it's not like we're rational when these things happen. it was kind of a knee-jerk reaction signing the contract with the western dental, since i was in that 'ok ok anything to make it stop even [insert large number of dollars i didn't have at the time]'. i even unofficially asked my parents for money last night. yeah. and i'm nearly forty two years old. and this depresses me. i'm very upset with myself for being a flake.
i would have made myself feel better by being organized and efficient and getting all manner of productive webthings done last night but no. it was benadryl and bed early. only woke up twice during the night (well, three times counting the cat), was having the same dream all night long. long marathon-type dream of all the helplessness symbols -- no shoes, can't dial a cell phone, can't find keys, lost, wanted a puppy, wanted my mommy, and that bit about having to go into the parallel dimension which was actually back in time a few hundred years and pass these challenges if you went in one way, but if you took the swirly warp thingy you could go back, if you could find it again. um. thank you video games, i needed that kind of stress in my dreams.
this morning i was getting my son dressed and he was whining he wanted to stay home and watch spiderman. oh man. sounded like such a good idea, but no. i personally would rather lay on the couch and cry than go to work, but that's not really an option.
"win the lottery"
"win the lottery"
"win the lottery"
Stacey and me.
thanks :) i suppose i ought to actually buy some lotto tickets then?
>i suppose i ought to actually buy some lotto tickets then?
scratchers, or the bit number drawing thingy? i'm pretty sure i have that many quarters in my car, so i'm cool with the expense.
Give me a minute here.
.
.
.
It�s forming in the shape of a �.
.
.
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It�s the shape of a�.
.
.
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It�s a scratch.
ok. good. if not, i was going to ask for six numbers between one and whatever number it goes up to. 51? something like that.
Wow, I am concentrating so hard for you that it is interfering with what I type in.
I'm impressed.
I thought I commented on this already. I didn't say anything deep, though...just that I'm thinking of you. I wish I could do more than that.
Oy. Don't regret spending money for your health. Seriously. If you can only pay the dentist $10 a month for the next 30 years...well...at least you're paying him. :D
Having a good cry on the couch can be very cathartic. I've done it many times myself.
well, that would be normal dentists. Western Dental has rabid receptionists that get you to write checks you don't even have the money for, and sign away the rest of the month in its entirety, and to a lesser extent the next ten months, in blood.
i knew this going in. i was just in denial about exactly how much time i'd been missing due to the teeth, and the missed hours combined with the cost, well ...
it's fairly hopeless. unless chris's mom comes through, and she's said she wants to help, but she's early alzheimer's, and she says that to everybody. other members of the family control the money. otherwise there probably woudn't be any left. *sigh*
Look I don't know you at all so you can tell me to shut the fuck up but....
You really shouldn't have to feel bad/defend yourself about getting mouth pain fixed. It's not really optional.
You can say it now if it'll make you feel better?
well, i understand he's upset -- i mean, his teeth aren't getting fixed, and they're worse than mine. i don't think it was a luxury, but it may as well have been. i mean, oh, i don't know. it's pretty horrible, being backed into a corner like this by my own teeth.
I wish there were something I could do, like send a check for a million dollars, but I'm a low-income citizen myself. You did need to get the teeth fixed though, or it would be far worse later.
I'm mentally sending "win the lottery" vibes your way.