ask the lizard

q. how do you tell a girl lizard and a boy lizard apart?
a. the lizards know. leave it up to us. don't oppress us with your narrowminded gender stereotypes.
q. why don't we get drunk and screw
a. ok.
q. dead bee metaphor
a. yes! yes! i totally have one of those! didja like it?
q. bullshit goal setting.
a. mmhmm, yeah, that too. and thanks for reminding me.
q. bad teenage poetry
a. oh hell yeah. oh.hell.yeah.
q. wild lizard molecule
a. the chicken howls at midnight. xray alpha foxtrot niner, repeat, xray alpha foxtrot niner. over?
q. my pants are too small how do i fix them
a. welllll, maybe if you weren't sitting on your ass asking google silly questions, they might not be too small? just a thought.
q. somebody's watching us
a. shut up! they're listening too!
q. lizard sex art
a. inspiring. ok, i'm going to need a volunteer from the audience, a can of e-z cheez, some ping pong balls, and a spatula.
q. dyed her hair leather boots pierced -xxx -xena
a. yeppers. why, you wanna fool around?