subliminal or sublingual or subsomething or otherwhere

i was something to say made of my own language however the waves, formless from the start, have fallen into an unearthly glassy trance flatline flowing from the sensation of russian or something quite similar being spoken into a courtesy phone just over my left shoulder by someone sitting surfing the same internet i'm typing into just over his right shoulder. listening to the soft soft consonance, phrases formed on a tongue that learned entirely different phonemes throughout its formative phases, i am lost in the difference which i confess tickles something somewhere near maybe the base of my skull & could easily easily lull me drowsy into dreams describing things i've never known, tempting tempting i want to relent, to let my lids give in to the gravity the gravity is everything no no that's not right is it? it is the strongest force in the universe yes but it is certainly not everything there are other things, i just can't at the moment remember even one of them.