February 2004 Archives

this covers the period from when i fell offline to ... who really knows. everything is relative, right? so. it's stuff i typed in a notepad window ... because.

i am currently AOLing at a cost of $2.50 per hour and sometimes my 'u' key doesn't work. um. is it my imagination or does aol 9.0 kind of not suck? it's possible it doesn't suck.

hold me i'm scared.

notepad blogging follows. but before you go there, might want to behold the madness. a song like no other song. inspiring comments like no other song by such a large margin.
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wow. the things you discover when there is no internet and there you are, disconnected, bereft of any bandwidth whatsoever, and i mean wtf? so anyway. wow.

civil rights. human rights. inalienable rights. it's what this great country was founded on, well, that and the graves of the natives we slaughtered so we'd have plenty of room to enjoy life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness. hey, our creator endowed us. US. not them.

it's human nature to want human rights, and it is also human nature to deny those rights to other humans. how do those who struggle against the rights of others manage to reconcile this in their minds? not just a few stray assholes, mind you, but the majority.

the latest in a long history of outnumberers, smugly enjoying their own rights while fighting against granting those same rights to others. claiming moral high ground while arguing in favor of the persecution of a minority. the court battles are fought along the increasingly blurry line between church and state while the the new religious reich gathers outside, calling for laws in accordance with their chosen faith. enjoying the right to practice their own beliefs, but outraged by the prospect of equal rights being granted to those with different beliefs, the divine right seeks legislative intervention. citing the bible, channeling mein kampf. not that i'm making comparisons between our godfearing leaders and hitler! oh hell no! hitler had lousy P.R. people. 'family values' would have been a much more effective tagline than 'master race'.

and i am not comparing discrimination to genocide. they are completely different things. totally unrelated. nothing whatsoever ... oh wait.

hate is hate.

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written about a week ago. i would update if i had time. calling card running out.
unrelated:
the new version of me is one

still it persists this offline shit. & to make matters worse the blogging & photos i saved to CD, i can't get off CD because this puter i'm on won't read CDs.

i can't figure out anything in particular to say.

i hate being offline.

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side note thought of on the way over here: money can buy happiness. if you don't think so you're not doing it right. let me show you. you'll need to send me some money though. paypal link in sidebar under 'what about me'. i'm only half kidding. the rest of me is ... something. i mean, ... i forget.

i am not sure what day it is. i know it has been five days since i've had the internet.

i have been blogging in notepad.

i have an hour to do five days worth of internetting. an hour.

one is the number of mojo jojo's there shall be in this world, and the number of mojo jojo's shall be one. three is right out.

when ppg villains quote the book of armaments, all's right with the world.

i don't have a lomo. but i have some sets of photoshop actions and a thing called a melancholytron which is a trial and will expire so i'm tryin' to convince myself i dig the sets of photoshop actions better. it's not working.

in order, l-r: original, photoshop actions v2

l to r: the original, and, the lomoized version:

l to r: original and the lomoized version:

i am a little confused as to which filter on some of 'em. but then i am on aol. so you know. my mind. um.

i always glance around before i start out from a red light, checking for cross-traffic idiots misjudging the yellow. the car that broadsided the buick wasn't anywhere near the intersection at that point, he was a good half a block away, and there's just no way of knowing who's going to straight run a red light.

god i hate that sound. spun the buick right around, facing oncoming traffic. i jumped out, guy jumped out. guy says, "i'm *so* sorry". i say, "dude, my registration's illegal. they'll tow my car away." he looked briefly confused, i'm guessing it's not quite the reaction he expected. "go." he said. i looked at all the people looking at me. i got in my car. i backed the wrong way down the street, pulled through a parking lot, and ... went to blockbuster to return the wallace and gromit game, but all they did was clean it and now it works.

he hit us doing maybe twenty? destroyed his car. bumper fell off, radiator broke, whole front end mangled. the buick? is a big solid car.

"clever things make people feel stupid, and unexpected things make them feel scared" ~~ Fry (Futurama)

remember that saying, i love my country but i hate my government? well. i live in a country where the majority of its citizens are shocked and disturbed by the sight of a female breast. now ordinarily i don't care what cliff the masses are hurling themselves over like the good little lemmings they are, but this is just fucking embarrassing. it's not just the ridiculousness of our collective hissyfit or the stupidity of an FCC investigation, no, it's the hypocrisy. and the twisted psychology behind it. oh yes we love boobs in this country, in fact we're obsessed, in a twisted nasty dirty bad mommy sort of way. this is just so freudian. and freud was a sick fuck.

i totally understand why some people move to europe.

it would be one thing if this was some unfortunate, instinctive human trait, to be both obsessed and disgusted with our own bodies, but it's not. it's learned behavior, a cultural mandate enforced with shame. to go against this is to risk ... well, if you missed the thousands of minutes of media coverage, just check the cover of people magazine. i mean fuuuuuck. we could be outraged over something that mattered, like oh, i don't know, maybe going to war for no particular reason? the mysterious imaginary vanishing weapons of mass destruction? but no. we're all atwitter over a breast-sighting. unnecessary killing: eh - happens. the human body: shocking! evil!

i'm not quite as daring as ms. jackson. but i'm doing my bit for the cause.

Docility boser electrotactic overplump mutistic chirping

yeah.

what are words without feeling? and i cannot feel a thing. a little itchy maybe, a little ache around the edges, that's about it. i can't even take fucking pictures. i look at things that once would have tickled my eyes excited and think, and this is a direct quote, "eh."

it is a quiet life, narrated reckless jaded in a nicotine whisper.

yesterday i watched a cat die. peaceful in her owner's arms. relieved of a burdensome existence, had nature taken its course it might have taken her a week or more to finish starving herself out of misery. still.

have you ever watched eyes die?

i almost said 'avoid it if at all possible' then decided against it. it's a terrible thing, and important. it makes a difference.

don't be an asshole

you're going to have to learn some new bubble buddy moves if you're going to go to the ninth dimension and defeat the robomonkey.

if i'm lucky mr. talent will rub his tentacles on my art.

my brain. it's like a sponge. bob.