unusually this woozy this early but here it is, time, time. relentless procession of thoughts shuffles past, shabby refugees of the uncivil unrest of the past four decades, anxiously searching the uncertain territory ahead with shattered eyes mostly but here and there a glitter, a glimmer, hope.
hope has always been the enemy, cunning and deceptive and utterly merciless and yet after all these years still irresistable still powerful persuasive with the delicious feasts of visions, how easy it is to settle into the warmth the fullness the seductive comfort; sedated in this decadence i drift off and the next thing i know it's the same old hard cold wakeup in a muddy ditch missing everything that mattered, even though it was unreal, it is still a loss.
is this depressing? shit i was gonna be funny but i had this in draft and i thought hey, have i whined enough lately? why yes. should i whine some more? why of course!
in unrelated news i am having to hold myself back by my own hair to keep from installing mysql 4.1 alpha release, i *need* the new features. oh god you have no idea. subselects! i need subselects sooooo bad. but it's in alpha. thou dost not subject thine webhosting clients to alpha releases unless ... unless you really need to right?
sigh.
