does this make my butt look big?

i love my daughter’s generous spirit. about a month ago, when i was complaining (as i will do, to anyone who’ll listen) about the fact i’ve gained some weight this year, she told me i could borrow her favourite pair of jeans until i got the fat issue sorted out & got back in my regular pants. i was dubious at first, since she’s significantly smaller than i am (in width i mean, she’s much taller). anyway, they jeans are heavenly stretch denim that doesn’t look like it’s being stretched, & they quickly became a staple in my wardrobe.

fast forward a month, she’s getting impatient. i keep pleading for more time with the pants, but she misses them so. saturday morning she walks in the door, holding a pair of jeans. i say, ?you want your pants back, don’t you?? she says, ?are they clean?? i say, ?well, they’re not incredibly dirty?. she’s apparently desperate, because she changes right into them even though they’re not fresh out of the dryer. i put on the new pair, also stretchy, but for some reason (to her) far less desirable. she motions for me to turn around, then indicates her approval of the whole ?do these make my butt look big? issue. of course, life makes my butt look big. thankfully, my daughter, & the textile industry, are compassionate & helpful in this area.

i love my daughter.

30 thoughts on “does this make my butt look big?

  1. “this year i will face it — i have my mother’s thighs.” remember that tv commercial? that would have me rolling around laughing every time. this line had me laughing out loud here at the computer. y’all are just funny! notice: i’m not making any “butt” observations. 🙂

  2. both pair were strange-sounding off-brands – the one i have now is “1020 solid” or something like that. they come from a little shop in downtown ventura that seems to carry the same type of merchandise that one might find in a flea market?

    in any case, the thing to look for is this new stretch denim they have. it doesn’t look like denim-flavored spandex anymore, it has just enough give to really be comfy. my daughter finds these things more often than i do, so i’d suggest going to stores frequented by teenage girls.

    oh one more thing my daughter taught me — always buy at least a boot cut jean, or more flare if you can find it. hope that these things stay in fashion a long time. i used to wear the tapered leg jeans, till my wise little girl convinced me that having jeans snug around your ankles makes your butt look HUGE, whereas if the legs flare at the bottom, well, it’s more balanced.

    everything i know about jeans, i learned from a teenager…

  3. trust me, Jon, the democratic process wouldn’t help at all — walking a couple miles a day would, though, & i am determined to do this. (any day now) i am NOT going to be in the blogumentary with an ass this size.

    even though it is somewhat balanced out by other prominent features, & can probably be excused on that account, i still miss all my old pants. i had quite a nice collection of pants, i look at them wistfully all the time.

  4. Well…… Do people complain about how big your ass is? Or do they seem to think your ass is pretty nice?

    From my experience, women who complain about the size of their ass usually have a pretty nice ass. I know, I know…. trying to convince you is pointless.

    I always figured it like this – if men are chasing after you, then your ass must not be too big. But for women the rule seems to be – “If I’m thinking about it, my ass must be too big”, or “If 2+2=4, my ass must be too big.” I get it. It’s just frustrating.

    Am I saying “ass” too much?

  5. people know better than to complain about the size of my ass. i’m the only one allowed to complain about it. see, no one believes me because all kinds of skinny girls complain about the size of their nearly nonexistent asses. i am not a skinny girl. the issues i have with the size of my ass (& everything else for that matter) are my own – there are lots & lots of people who find zaftig redheads quite desirable, but it’s my desire to be a little less zaftig.

  6. oh, i love the flared jeans! just love them! may they never go away again! i remember those dark days in the mid-to-late-eighties when they started having to put zippers in the ankles so you could get your foot through the bottom. maybe this is ok for skinny folk, but for those of us who would rather not have ankle width as a referent for considering ass size, flares are a blessing.

  7. not that this is my problem (or even my conversation really), but i’m motivated to comment that i’ve always bought boot-cut jeans. but then, i wear boots most of the time (because i like them — and because i ride a motorcycle most of the time) and i hate the jeans-inside-the-boot look. 🙂 way back when i was younger, about all i could get was flare-legs. they were ok, but were not good when working in the field because brush would snap up the flare and hit my leg. ouch! is it an irony that we can learn things from teenagers? side comment: you might check western-wear stores also. we have a dollar wester wear store here in town that is less pricey than the *real* cowboy places. 😉

  8. thank you God for boot cut flared low rise jeans. Please never go away. They make me happy. Tall shoes also because I am 5’2 and they make me feel 5’6.

  9. kd,
    I want to get a pair of those jeans!!
    I don’t care if you wear a tapered, or boot style jean.
    Just please don’t start wearing those big wide legs they are pushing on us.
    Please, we both lived through that faze…I am sorry its starting all over again! The fashion mags are featuring them for Spring! Protest! Protest!

  10. sweatpants are comfy but they make my butt look ENORMOUS. only around the house, or under a long sweatshirt for a quick dash to the store.

  11. ok i see all of you talking about big butts! but what about those who don’t have big asses and want some kind of pants that can make your tiny butt look big or at least nice?

  12. well, kristy, i really have no idea what to tell you on that, having very little experience in that area. there was a time i was thin, i remember it vaguely, i think i had to try on a lot of pants to find the right fit, but the right jeans can probably do wonders.

    [sigh] i wish i shard your problem, kristy.

  13. I don’t get this story at all, Iwant pants that make my butt look small and make my legs look skinny.. so your saing she wants her legs and butt fat???

  14. Well…you see I probably have like the biggest butt in the world!!!!So don’t worry I know how you feel, I wish I could just cut it right off!!!!

  15. no, she’s saying that pants that are flared at the ankle help balance things out, rather than pants fitted around the ankles which serve to highlight the size of the ass.

    alas, the only real solution isn’t pants. it’s actually sensible diet and exercise. i don’t do that, so, i wrote about pants.

    do you have any idea how many people on a daily basis ask google if this makes their butt look big?

  16. Big butts on women are the very sexy !! Any butt under 40 inches is not big and not sexy.

  17. Yeah, I would really like to make my butt look bigger. Ever since I lost weight, my butt shrunk! I would really like a pair of jeans to seem like I have a “GHETTO BOOTY”

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