you do not want me in the car with you when you are driving. especially when the car you are driving is mine. but irregardless of whose car it is, if you don’t have the exact reactions that i would have in any given situation, i am going to annoy you. i have a virtual brake pedal of my own over on the passenger side, you know, & i know how to use it, which is more than i can say for you, with your real pedal. when i notice brake lights on cars four cars in front of the car in front of us, i would at least back of the gas. when you don’t react the instant i notice this, i get this horrible feeling in the pit of… wherever. it’s like i’m being propelled against my will into certain disaster.
it’s a really similar sensation to the fear of heights thing i get, if i am anywhere near the edge of anything, i feel dizzy, like i’m being sucked over the edge. that’s vertigo, right? well that’s the exact thing i feel when i see something in the road & i’m not sure if you’ve seen it yet. i can’t help it, i’m going to have to bring it to your attention. sometimes i gasp, sometimes i squeak, & if it’s a particularly terrifying thing i think you don’t see, i might actually yell. it could be a general yell, or if it appears to me that you’re seriously being negligent, well, then i might yell right at you.
actually, the more i think about it, you’d better just give me those keys. save us both a whole lot of grief.