does this mean it’s time to quit?

No, I did not off myself, but I did cry on the way home from Walmart. By the time I got home I started wondering what sort of person cries over the loss of a blog? Better yet, what sort of person cries over the abrupt loss of a blog the day she is mentioned in the newspaper of one of the largest cities in the United States of America?

This bitch right here.

I was perfectly normal with kd. I even sounded quite put together to Gordon. Ohhh, I think that for whatever reason, maybe the blog wasn’t meant to be seen by someone who would have picked up that paper. I have to trust God’s ultimate purpose. Then for about half an hour I complained to my mom, who didn’t have a fucking clue what I was talking about. Blog? What’s a blog? Can’t you just mail the essays? I don’t get it. Blog? What’s a blog?

There are three important lessons I have learned today:

1. The blog has meant far more to me than I even knew. I had no idea how much of myself came out in it. I had no idea how much of a release it has been for me. I had no idea what a comfort it is waking up to daily sardonicism.

2. It’s just a blog. You can begin a new blog and a new place that you own yourself, which is what I’m in the process of doing. Well, kd is in the process of doing. It’s just a blog. You can still breath. You can still write. Your son still shits his diaper and cries when his mobile stops.

3. No golden opportunity just falls into your lap. Not if you are me anyways. When things don’t work out as your little heart had so wanted them to, it’s not a good idea to feel sorry for yourself for too long. It is however, good to follow my mom’s advice, which was,”You just need to learn to get out there and kick some ass!”

They say a blog will never make you famous. Mine almost did. Does that count? Do I get a cookie? Do I get a golden ticket to New York City where I’ll wear knee boots and buy glasses without lenses because I don’t need them? Will I ever wear pencils in my hair? Do lunch? Talk about penile implants with Patrick Swayze when he’s in his 60’s?

Not without my blog I won’t.

22 thoughts on “does this mean it’s time to quit?

  1. I think you reach alot more people than you think you do..
    I agree, don’t sell yourself short..
    People you don’t even know care about you..
    And, that in itself, makes you one special woman..

  2. You hang in there, Melly…
    I may barely know you, but I *do* know some of your friends, and what they’re capable of.

    You may be down, but you ain’t *out* kiddo…

  3. ya know, i just realized that should belong to you and matty. well, matty anyway. but i can’t get it out of hock, unfortunately. anyway, you two are famous, trust me.

  4. does this mean it’s not just me this time? woohoo! you do get a cookie for making backups. put them on your wishlist and i’ll send ’em. *hug*

  5. keep the faith, little melly! i still think that ‘if you write it, they will come’ wait…um..that sounds weird…but you know what i mean. you’ve got the goods—you will be heard!

  6. I’m with Scott. I lurk on Daily Sardonicism. It keeps me sane during my working day.

    One of the main reasons I keep going back to DS is that I enjoy your writing so much. And I can assure you that working as an editor means that I read ALOT of stuff, most of it crap, and you are just streets ahead of everybody. You write very, very well. You have a gift.

    I’ll stop gushing now.

    I was really disappointed to see that DS was down when I went to read it this morning.

    You are missed!

  7. Aw melly! I woulda cried too!
    I’d send you some chocolate chip cookies but I still can’t figure out how to send them as email attachments. But I’m working on it.
    Wish I could think of more comforting things to say – but I know that kd is a gem and will somehow make it all ok, Code Goddess that she is.

  8. Hey, Melly’s in San Antonio! I had no clue! (batgrl has relatives there) She lives in the land of epic Mexican food! I am having major restaurant envy!

  9. My mom doesn’t know what I do either. She thinks because I’m in advertising that I’m responsible for every commercial on tv (yikes).

    Truly sorry to hear about your bad luck- damn those fucktards.

  10. melly, i almost wrote you an email today but i didn’t know what the fuck to say. my blog was down for 48 hours a couple of weeks ago, and in that time, everyone and their mother (okay, like 4 people) decided to link to me. and my blog is new and small and pathetic, but it was a big pain in my ass.

    i am totally in love with ds. it might just be my favorite blog. i love your writing and your fuck-all attitude. and somehow you make motherhood seem like the coolest thing on earth.

    your site will be back and we’ll organize a day of melly where we all link to you in giant 40 point font. the day of melly. it’s coming. don’t despair.

  11. i’m with portia on this. a day of melly! a link to ds on sysblog oughta be good for 2 hits maximum. no, it’ll be good for no hits. the only people who read sysblog have posted comments here… but it is the thought that counts, right?

  12. I’m so glad to know you are okay. Thank you. Hoopty.

    I’m glad to know that your blog means a lot to you, because it means a lot to me too. You are a great writer. A very funny creative honest person. Please don’t leave without a forwarding address.

  13. Just dropping by to cheer you up Melly, girl!

    (ok, so now I get the story…I was confused over at Hoopty’s…but thank God for that man for letting us know about what happened)

    I really, really hope that this unfortunate event will bring you double good karma points. Gawd, it better make up for the fuck-up. 😉

  14. ARGH! Melly, I’m so sorry! PG is right–You are an awesome writer, and your writing touches more people than you can ever begin to count. Keep your chin up, girly. We’ll all send you love and warm vibes to get you through this. (and I’m so glad kd is able to help you—yaay! for kd!) 😀

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