friday night

i was going to not get the beer and write something clever about how, this week, i discovered to my delight that cleansing my system had a strange effect on me, lowering a different subset of my inhibitions. all manner of heretofore unforseen wackyness happening.

but then i realized my mindset when i tried thinking this through — the self-denial, the broken self-promise. the lack of selfishness, which i’ll tell anyone who’ll listen is far, far underrated. anyway as we all learned from watching risky business, sometimes you just got to say… what the fuck.

enough with the language! for shame!

in other news, chris’s quirky family is at it again. seen here in happier, but still chaotic times (last t-day), we have john, chris’s brother, and tami, his girlfriend or wife depending on who you believe (john is a pathological liar – incapable of telling the truth even if it doesn’t matter). so, (again depending on who you believe) tonight tami is in jail for attempted manslaughter on john. something about hitting a car he was in with her car.

knowing john as i do, i’d say he probably had it coming if this actually happened. that is not to say tami isn’t significantly psychotic herself, it’s just, well, they deserve each other. in the grand scheme of relationships, these two hit karma jackpot.

maybe i’m biased, but i’ve seen john wail on (whale on? wale on? what is the proper slang spelling here?) previous girlfriends. even if he is (depending on who you believe) ‘working and doing good’ now, however unlikely that is, i still think he had it coming.

‘may you live in interesting times’

14 thoughts on “friday night

  1. not really. this is fairly normal. the phonecall from the mom, detailing what she remembers of the story john told her. i ascertained that he did not do this in conjunction with a request for financial assistance, and decided not to worry.

    just another day in my life. gotta love that ‘not boring’ part, eh?

  2. indeed. it is the weekend and you’re not the one in jail. wow, i just applied that to myself and my recent bout of insanity. life is good 🙂

  3. how very true. i mean, with all the homicidal (or manslaughterable) urges i had this week, i can now happily report there are no casualties! and i am a free woman! live is very good.

  4. No. No dullness around here. If you deal with familial homocide attempts without smoking, then I reckon you ain’t smoking anymore, period, in spite of your desire to pretend it’s not really happening.

  5. ooh, did i mention that i got some of the little cigar-lettes? but i bought them because i was going to, before i found out about tami.

    and that would not have driven me over the edge. i know tami. i’ve been expecting this, more or less. glad it wasn’t me. glad it was only ‘attempted’. she’s like that.

  6. are you sure that we are not related? i think that john and tami are my sister and brother-in-law (to be for the last 14 years…can’t quite get the truth out of them either). rock on, baby…rock on!

  7. oh kd… at first i thought maybe you were joking and poking fun at people who really *do* have relatives like this…and i felt bad. but, it slowly seeped in that maybe i’m not alone in all the chaos, and other (quasi)normal people have abnormal families too? maybe? i don’t ever post about my family. they cause way too much chaos in my life, far too much stress. hence the reason they live in Utah and i moved far, far, far away to NY! in short, your post gave me a little bit of comfort…in a strange way, i know. 😉

  8. oh, this is quite real (well, as far as, it’s the story i heard from chris who heard it from his mom, who is quite elderly and not as sharp as she ever was, and she got her info from john, so — consider the source).

    it actually occurred to me that i should call the county jail (i used to have the jail information phone number memorized, but i’ve thankfully forgotten it) to confirm what charges she was being held for, but they put you on hold for like ever.

    suffice to say, that i know tami has a very violent past. so does john but hers includes deadly weapons. (oh, and guess what? there are drugs involved here. yeah. who knew, reading the story, that they’d be tweekers?)

    and i wouldn’t make fun of people with, er, interesting relatives.

  9. I always think that my various family members would make great fodder for a soap opera – but then the most bizarre ones would also be the ones to sue my ass off for doing so. *sigh*

    ‘may you live in interesting times’
    I’ve always wondered if that’s a blessing or a curse. Guess it depends on who wishes it on you, huh…

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