new hobby

(more road-related bitchiness)

so at lunch today i discovered a fun new hobby. you know those bumper stickers on the back of commercial vehicles, with the phone number and the vehicle number? mmhmm. yes, i called one today. and it was good, and i’m going to do it some more.

so the bitch cuts me off (one of those, i’m going to go first because i can make a left turn faster than you can make a right) — this is wrong, ok? and then she speeds up so bad it was tough for me to catch her, even with a nice little v6 under my hood. as i did this, i held my cell phone up prominently just in case she looked in her rearview mirror as she barely slowed down making a right on the next red light. i gave up following her at this point even though it was almost too many numbers for my pissed off brain to remember, and made the call.

“hello, i’m calling about your truck number 96, that just cut me off and then went so fast it was hard to even get this number to call you. i hope the number was 96, i only had a short time before she disappeared from view, and i wasn’t going to go fast enough to catch up. blonde girl in a white pickup. if i can give you anymore info, call me…”

it was very satisfying. very satisfying indeed.

11 thoughts on “new hobby

  1. I’ve done that before, even when there wasn’t a specific sign. As long as the vehicle is “commercial” (i.e. has a business name on it), I make note of the license plate, then call the owner of the company when I get near a phone.

    Lately, I’ve been keeping a cell phone in the car, so the effort to make the call is less than remembering all the details until getting to a land-line.

    And, I’ve even received letters back in the mail from owners, thanking me for reporting their bad drivers. Who knows, maybe the owners were looking for an excuse to fire their sorry asses!

    My wife has more road rage in her than I do. I tend to keep the emotion down, but report the bastards.

  2. You bet! Some businesses are darned interested in that type of thing!

    Dumb behavior can have a direct impact with insurance premiums when and if that driver makes an avoidable mistake.

    …and lousy driving habits may have even more of an impact on the bottom line if the vehicle displays advertising and you (and all your friends) slam that company and do not do business with them.

    Then again, I’m somewhat sensitized to this after working for all these years in a business with rather high profile vehicles (emergency services).

  3. Good idea… I must try it. Still, there is so much bad driving on the roads here (even I am susceptible to it) that the call will most like elicit little more than a yawn. Imagine me going “Hello, I’d like to report vehicle 96, who just cut me off in traffic.”. Then she’d say “Oh an accident? How many people are dead, or trapped in the vehicle with their foot crushed, or thrown from the vehicle through the windscreen and had their face all smashed to smithereens?”. Then I’d go “No, nothing like that happened… They just cut me off and etc. etc.” By the time I got to ‘cut me off”, I’d just be talking to myself.

  4. actually this one was a very nice recording, it said, ‘we appreciate your call, please leave a detailed message after the beep’. so, you get to tell your part of the story without having to justify it to anyone. what they do with the information is immaterial — but i tend to believe that they would want to be aware of people driving their company vehicles in such a manner that they could incur some major liabilities.

    if it was me, i’d want to know.

  5. O now maybe I want a cell phone! The other day, I went to a friend’s house for dinner and her husband had almost been killed by a bus on his way home from work. It was sooo cool to listen to him ranting on the phone to the bus company!

  6. and you know, i’ve actually had the urge to do the opposite — i once had to get on the freeway behind a bus on a slightly uphill onramp, and this bus got up to speed and merged gracefully into freeway traffic without any of the usual bus-related slowness and traffic obstruction. i wanted to call the bus company and say “hey, that guy did a good job” but at the time i felt silly.

    now that it’s my new hobby, i’m going to have fun with it.

  7. I did that once too. Got an immediate phone call back from the management with PROFUSE apologies. It was well worth my effort…

  8. I love doing that. There’s a sick sense of satisfaction in it. Most people are annoying and you can’t do a damn thing about it.

    When someone’s annoying and you can exact some sort of petty revenge for it?

    All the more fun.

  9. once upon a time, when I was a freight forwarder, I walked out of my office to see a string of trucks parked on the opposite side of the road…all of them had empty trailers ready to pick up from the warehouse. one of the drivers made it a point to shout and make profane gestures by grabbing his crotch…you know the type…whoooooaaaa baby c’mere I give you some of this baby. I went back inside, and called up his dispatcher…gave him the truck number etc…I stood out on the porch, listening as the dispatcher called the guy on the CB…he told him to drop his trailer, and head back to the yard. I just waved and smiled. That driver was there to pick up *my* shipment…and the dispatcher was my boyfriend. Heh.

  10. What a wonderful hobby. It is very satisfying, is it not? Those fuckers sometimes drive insane, which is not something I’d be doing with a company truck/car and a sticker on the back that tells everyone I cut off just where they can get me in trouble.


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