you sexist thing, you

sexism. oppression. inequality. general assumptions made on the basis of gender — these are bad things, yes? of course.

can we, should we, take gender out of every equation and interact with each other in an androgynous void, one where we cannot acknowledge the obvious, physiological, hormonal, neurological differences between us? in a word, no. because men and women are different. and with the wide variety of sexual orientations, there are any number of ways the hormones might fly. and fly they will. try and stop them. go ahead. i’ll wait.

see? unstoppable force of nature. sex. sexuality. sexual identity. sexism. where do we draw the line? the problem i have with hard line feminism is that it wants more than just equal pay and equal opportunity, it also quite frequently involves reacting to any sexual overture, overt or otherwise, with outrage. how dare you? pig! if we remove all sex-based interaction from inter-gender** communication, how the hell are we going to partner, or reproduce? at which point does it become ok to have a sexual thoughts about another person?

of course i don’t mean outright sexual harassment or assaultive behavior like public asspatting or boobgrabbing. i’m talking about the the hormonal subtext of every interaction between sexual beings. it’s there because we’re different. and you can try and erase this, try and try and try again, and you’re not going to succeed. you can search out and anazlyze and look for instances of inequity in everything, and there will always be something, because you just can’t sterilize the difference out of existence.

you can fight clear instances of prejucide and discrimination, but why fight the id?

** taking into consideration gender is not a binary thing, this covers just about everybody.

Testosterone (by Bush)

I’m a man
I’m real proud of my manhood
I like to smoke
Ten thousand cigarillos

Eight ball
I could climb any fountain
I never cry
I only bawl when I’m losing
And I’ve never been wrong
Never been wrong
I’m looking so good
Looking so good

Got a big gold gun
Got a big gold bullet
And I guess you could say
I’m real full of it
I’m real full of it

I’m real straight
You wanna see my peccadillos
Hot dog 7:30 every morning
And I’m big into war
Big into war
Big into war

I am a whore
I am a whore

Got a big gold gun

I shave with Gillette
Shave with Gillette
And I’m patting my back
Patting my back
Got a big gold bullet

11 thoughts on “you sexist thing, you

  1. note: i made every effort to phrase things in a way that would minimize the sense that i was writing it *at* anyone, yet trying not to dilute my own voice too much in the process.

    (translation: i’ve just had an opinion everyone’s not going to agree with, and it’s very uncomfortable. or maybe it’s the extra onions on that chile i had for lunch.)

    this is not pointed at anyone, but rather a response to several posts i’ve seen recently.

  2. aha! you might have been drinking, but you pointed out a boo-boo — i really meant to stay away from the binary concept of gender (hard as hell to do, but you know) — in any case, i suppose it applies as far as, that’s generally what people mean when ‘sexism’ is discussed — a male/female thing.

    it’s confusing.

    i think it also kind of goes back to that one post i made where i speculated, is it possible to sexually harass a coworker of the same sex, if you are not gay?

    i must conclude i myself am a sexist pig.

  3. Sex = bad. Work = good. Sex = bad. Work = good. Sex = bad. Work = good. Sex = bad. Work = good. Sex = bad. Work = good. Sex = bad. Work = good.

    We need to concentrate on the important things, like making sure the top executives where we work get paid at least 2,317 times what the average worker gets paid. There is no time for sex.

  4. sure there is. infact that’s what the restrooms and supply closets are there for. didn’t you know that?

    did i say that outloud?

  5. this may sound odd….but a world without sexual tension/subtext would be a world without witty repartee. and that would be no fun at all. not to mention what it would do to the music industry.

    great post, kd

  6. I don’t disagree with that point of view at all, Kd. There ARE differences between men and women. And, yes, do deal with the overt. Do address the blatantly offensive. But for the sake of everyone’s sanity, don’t run around pointing at shadows and accusing them of sexism.

    There’s a fine line between sensitivity and over-reaction. I’m not certain where it lies, but it’s often crossed. Meh.

    Such is my opinion.

  7. in my place of employment, there is most assuredly some improper conduct. i work in a male-dominated field, and i rather welcome a more relaxed atmosphere. i’d prefer the occasional inappropriate remark and some resulting laughter, to hyper-sensitivity in which people say things and then freak out that they said them.

    it might be sexist of me to say, i’d rather be thought of as ‘one of the guys’, but that’s how i see it.

    i read an article in the LA times over the weekend, about how they’ve banned porn in california prisons because it ‘creates a hostile workplace for female guards’. if they’re that sensitive, maybe prison guard is a bad vocational choice? i’m just sayin’.

  8. also, the song lyrics in ‘more’? i was singing that real loud on the way into work. like the swaggering feel of them, even if it is totally satirical.

  9. So odd that I was just ruminating on this (your basic, ‘men and women are different’ premise, anyway…) in the shower this morning and now I’m here, reading it.

    I eschew feminism as a general principle, but before my children were born I was known to be of the ‘gonna buy them the same toys and expose them to the same thisses and thats’ school of thought. After they were born (one male, one female in less than fifteen months) my tune got changed FOR me.

    It was baffling, you see, for they fell into certain gender-specific patterns of behavior with no outside influence at all. We are hard-wired a certain way, and gender certainly plays a big part in our makeup. We are predisposed to certain strengths and weaknesses as a result of being born male or female and I for one like it that way. I believe that God made us to compliment one another, making one weak where the other is endowed and vice-versa. It’s a pretty cool setup, in my eversohumble opinion.

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