shadows with no substance, in the shape of men

either i am more exhausted right now than i’ve ever been in my whole life, or i have ghosts.

it was nevermind what a.m. when i curled up on the couch. i was cold, on the verge of shivering cold, so i burrowed under the blanket & began to drift off. & then there was something pillow-like, batting me on the head? this was tactile & vividly audible, & upclose & personal, tangible. i thought it might be the cat, & i thought this for a good long moment, because i couldn’t move or make a sound; finally i managed a nice loud ‘what the fuck?!’ … & it stopped. & the cat was nowhere near, which was rather a moot point, since it would have had to be at least four feet tall & capable of wielding a pillow, & my cat is short & lacks opposable thumbs.

i curled up even curlier under the blankets, by this time shivering hard. it’s never below 65° & generally closer to 70° in that house at night, but i felt cold like i’d never be warm again. just as i began to relax a little (i have intense goosebumps just writing this) it started again, this time, poking at my ribcage — considering the way i curl, this would not be possible for anything with any substance. it was damned annoying. i told it to quit it, & it did. & then i looked over at the computer & i would swear there was someone sitting in the chair, leaning forward intently gazing into the darkened monitor screen. so i threw a pillow at it.

& then without further interruptions, i fell asleep.

13 thoughts on “shadows with no substance, in the shape of men

  1. it’s wonderful, isn’t it? it’s unquestionably the nicest compliment i’ve ever received.

  2. I didn’t notice any ghosts when I was there.. maybe the ghost is new? The bee taking revenge?

    Just kidding.. I think it was just insomnia

  3. well, yeah, this is the first time i’ve run into the ghost, & i’ve been there for years. i think maybe my insomnia has been annoying the ghost, who has important ghosting to attend to & can’t with me clacking away at the keys till the wee hours.

  4. Clacking keys, clacking chains?

    Maybe he thinks you’re impinging on his territory?



  5. Hey, I tried to call you back, but our phones are fucked up. For some reason calls can come in, but when I try to make one, there is no dialtone.

    I hope you made it home okay. :* Love you wifey.

  6. More fun to believe! So, that’s what I do, but I secretly check such apparitions for reflections of myself that I might not see in a regular mirror, you know, just to be data-rich.

  7. I have pills that can make this ghost go away. They tend to do a number upon one’s ambition, too, so be fore warned (is that a compound word? fuck it, I’m not looking it up).

  8. well, adventurously enough, i’m about to turn off the lights & crawl onto my couch, & see if … naah. wishful thinking i’m sure. but i would love to believe there is a spirit world. i don’t disbelieve, but … eh. i was probably just really really exhausted last night, weird things happen between the waking & dream states.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *