not recommended if realism is important to you. not that this isn’t real. your mileage will most definitely vary. you were warned.
whereas it is two thirtyish in the morning and i am sitting in my living room wearing a sleeveless hoodie t and panties, both black, and
whereas this is not a bad look for me, a fact which is still rather new to me and
whereas my camera has eaten its batteries and besides i’m not that kind of girl (anymore anyway) and
whereas considering i feel there is a need to be at least partially naked here, i have chosen instead to share an entirely inexplicable thoughtset that came rushing out of the back of my mind’s shadows and
whereas i will stipulate the sense this makes is dubious at best, it is my duty to inform you that nothing written around here is ever surreal to me at the moment it is written, also i am more or less just a transcriptionist and
whereas since i do not know the the unknowable or the improbable without cause, i would conclude that this has some significance, although beyond that it would be irresponsible for me to make any further endorsements of the soundness of what follows, or its fitness for publication. to wit:
a temporally distorted instance just opened … rather a nonspecific openness just occurred to me (not right here-now. no.) (no this was a dimension or so over, the next door neighborly one i hold dearly responsible for the provision of the occasional occasional vision.) and no i did not fall in, not in this, no delusions, not one, none. but that is not my point.
my point is i know. now. i do. i also know i do not want to. on that issue, i am more than clear.
this is murderous clarity, though not physically or spiritually, or even mentally. it is still killing. and there is still life but at the moment it will not become imagery captured in words for you, nothing about this can be adapted into captivity at this point. and besides i am bereft oh just a bit and i find i must decline.
also i will tell you that by morning there will be regret or better over the posting of this thing. i will try to let it stand, please forgive me if i find i am unable.