negative affirmations

  • entenmann’s ultimate crumb cake is not the answer. wait. yes it is.
  • i will not kill anyone. else. today. unless it becomes necessary.
  • i will not hang out at thinking, hmm.
  • i will not be tharn. unless i look really cute doing it.
  • i will not make melodramatic lists with ulterior motives carefully designed to elicit certain reactions, and then go tharn and hang out at rather than answer my email.
  • i will not have a beer before noon. that’s right there will be no sleepdrinking whatsoever.
  • i will not avoid my email because it makes me nervous. even though i have every right to be nervous. all that spam yeah that’s it.
  • i will not bite my toenails. or anyone elses.
  • i will not put anything larger than my elbow in my ear. or your ass for that matter. thank me. thank me now.
  • i will not use my blog as a tool of hypnotic evil. you are getting very sleepy. probably because this is so boring. but maybe not. [insert spooky theramin effect]

8 thoughts on “negative affirmations

  1. what you mean no toe biting. but.but. they are yummy, and cute. and nibbley and did i mention, cute? liz, you know you’re taking all the fun out of life ;o>.
    ooh sleepy..zzzzzzzz…

  2. no, i just meant that bad habit of chewing the toenails. toe nibbling is still in. oh definitely. but maybe not my own. or — hey! that gives me an idea.

  3. Entenmann�s crumb cake has answered a lot of my life deficienies, I’ll tell you that.

    Wow – that spot is intense.

    I like your list, by the way.

  4. i was googling for the lyrics of hotdog in a hallway and i found this blog with these interesting other lyrics and i googled for them to see who it was and ended up at which is, yeah, intense.

  5. what, you can’t bite your own toes? i … now here’s an idea for an interesting self-portrait. oh my yes.

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