resourceful blondeness

my headphones are my sanctuary. but my kid uses mine when his break, and then … well, they break. i had one pair he didn’t break, & it was ’cause they were broken when i got ’em. someone found them & gave them to me, i forget, & i’m a packrat, so here they were. and my last pair of kidphones had one side out, and … i need headphones. one side didn’t work, and was missing the hook dealy that hangs it over the ear. wiggling the cord did make the sound cut in & out, so there was hope. i used a hair tie to secure the wire, turned and bent in such a way that it makes contact. i took a different sort of ear thingy from another broken pair & stuck one end under the rubber band so that the speaker would hang precariously over my ear.

& this works. surprisingly well. astonishingly, even.

i used to do this all the time when i was a kid, i was always fixing my headphones. not very well, the repairs were klunky & generally temporary, but whatever works right? & i did indeed make headphones work on many occasions.

headphones have always been my sanctuary, my little hidey-hole. they don’t make the world go entirely away but they do think twice before bugging me, since it’s such a hassle getting my attention (hint: it’s the same whether i them loud, or quiet, or turned off — it’s not that i can’t hear you, it’s just that i am ignoring you.) and music, music has saved me so many times.

anyway, living with someone ostensibly way better at this type of stuff than me, and headphones break, and he says ‘i don’t have a soldering iron’, and that’s that. well for some reason, i … started to believe that it really had to be done with a soldering iron. in fact, i had the ‘no soldering iron’ thought all by myself, in my own mind.

but at nine thirty p.m. with no cash whatsoever & no headphones, it became time for drastic measures. i stood up and announced that i used to fix headphones all the time, because i didn’t know it couldn’t be done. the response was, this is microfiber you can’t feel where the break is. i said, you can pinch them, and sometimes they make the connection, then you just do something to hold them that way. the response to this was a shrug.

well. ha. ha-ha. and neener neener neener.

before i knew i couldn’t do it that way, i fixed headphones. the question is, when i did find out it couldn’t be done the way i had been doing it, why did i believe that? “you can’t do that” “well, i just did” “no, it won’t work, because blah blah” “oh. okay then”.

what? what?

and now for something completely different:

9 thoughts on “resourceful blondeness

  1. Oh my, its not the Lizard anymore its well, KD, but not the old KD, no a new one. Cute to the point of distraction, and even happy looking, whats up with that?

    And the headphones, McGuyver.

  2. brilliant. you have just described succinctly my entire experience as a songwriter these past, oh, 22 years.

    ‘you can’t put that melody with that chord change…’

    ‘why not?’

    ‘it’s….it’s just wrong!’


    and that chord…what is that? what are you doing with your fingers? you can’t just make up chords!’

    ‘why not?’ etc, etc, etc.

    conclusion: berklee college of music can go fuck itself. [/rant]

  3. my living situation is complicated to say the least. i’ve given up trying to explain it, and am concentrating on understanding it myself.

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